First I want to say Happy Mother's Day to all you AMAZING women out there! I hope your day is filled with so much love ♥
Right now it's Friday morning and I'm writing this and scheduling it to post on Sunday. I wasn't planning on writing a Mother's Day blog post at all...heck, I rarely ever stray from client session posts, but I cried on the potty today and want to share. Yep, I said it..."potty", which is how you really know I'm a mom...I even use that term with grown adults lol. You're probably wondering about the crying part though right? I bet your first thought might have been that it was the typical "crying out of stress, while locking yourself in the bathroom to find just a few seconds of solitude, all while little fingers cram themselves under the door" type situation (oh come on...YOU KNOW you've been there) but it wasn't....
My youngest is finishing preschool in a couple of weeks. He only goes 3 days a week so he is at home with me all by himself on Mondays and Fridays. I purposely did this. I am beyond blessed to be able to stay at home with my children, and even though I had the ability to send him to preschool 5 full days a week, I just wasn't ready to part with my baby a year before I had to. This morning I had shipped my daughter off on the bus, shut the front door after waving till she couldn't see me anymore, and slipped past my 4 year old downstairs to the basement bathroom to do my business in peace. About a minute in, I heard him upstairs calling out for me, "Mommy??". I knew at that moment if I chose to stay quite and let him find me he would begin to search for me with panic creeping in his voice and an ever quickening pace of footsteps till he discovered my location. I hadn't tipped him off about where or what I needed to do, so my location would probably be the last place he would search for me. We have a 2 story with a basement and that is a lot of ground for a panicked 4 year old to cover, so I called out to him...over...and over.......annnnnd over, like a game of marco polo till he found me on my throne. He walked in and without skipping a beat laid his wii remote on the back of the toilet behind me and started in on his conversation... I knew I was in for the long haul. I was pretty much done by this point but I listened to him talk, he asked me if I was pooping, he asked me about my tape measure (I've been working on my beach body people! This momma gets a much needed vaca in a few weeks ♥) he asked me how the tape measure worked as he pulled it in and out and described to me how HE thought it should work, and continued to ramble on about a few other things. I finally asked him if I could finish going potty by myself and he said "Oh ya!" (like it had just dawned on him for the first time that I'd want privacy) he skipped out the door and shut it. I called out to him "Hey do you want your wii remote??" He ran back and before reaching behind me to get the remote planted a giant kiss on my cheek with a headlock hug and told me "I love you sooo much Mommy" and then he was gone. I sat there for a few more seconds recovering from the whirlwind and I started to cry. Soon, very soon, potty time will forever be a lonely event. And even though that is something I have dreamed of for 12 1/2 years now...I can feel the time of freely given snuggles, "I love you mommy's" given every 10 minutes, reassuring "you're the best mommy in the universe" compliments, unlimited tight squeezes, and potty kisses slipping from my grasp.
I wish I had a pause button, or a time machine so I could have the peace of mind that I could revisit these moments....but I don't. I'm going to just soak it all up while I still have it...
Whatever season you are in moms, soak it up...soak it up♥
Photo credit to the AMAZING Jessica Paxson